So, I'm packing new luggage to take on the Amtrak with me to visit my adult son and daughter in-between Thanksgiving and Christmas. It is never too late for healing. Never give up!
Karen, when I listened to your piece on "stored pain" it left me feeling uncomfortable. So, the next day I decided to listen again to find out why. After yes a third sampling my emotions were pricked by your description of some individuals who build their entire identity about their pain. Bingo! I saw myself and was distraught, but surprisingly encouraged at the same time. You helped me to recognize that childhood rejection, neglect and abuse had snowballed into a lifetime of anticipated rejection. So much so that when my two adult children were not able to visit or invite me to spend this Thanksgiving or Christmas with them this year I, predictably, interpreted the disappointment as rejection. "They don't really love me", I thought. "I'm just a burden they don't want to have around because I am a sad, old widow who's a downer". But before I could further spiral into a full fledged pity party they each tested me that, while they both had to work during the holidays, they were each planning to fly, one from the West Coast and one from the East Coast, to Chicago to meet me for a long weekend. I was shocked, elated, and humbled that it was love, which cost them both, that motivated them to visit me, not pity and it was certainly not rejection.
So, Karen, I see that I have more unpacking of old baggage by the side of the road to explore and forgive. Thank you for your loving direction.
So, I'm packing new luggage to take on the Amtrak with me to visit my adult son and daughter in-between Thanksgiving and Christmas. It is never too late for healing. Never give up!
Karen, when I listened to your piece on "stored pain" it left me feeling uncomfortable. So, the next day I decided to listen again to find out why. After yes a third sampling my emotions were pricked by your description of some individuals who build their entire identity about their pain. Bingo! I saw myself and was distraught, but surprisingly encouraged at the same time. You helped me to recognize that childhood rejection, neglect and abuse had snowballed into a lifetime of anticipated rejection. So much so that when my two adult children were not able to visit or invite me to spend this Thanksgiving or Christmas with them this year I, predictably, interpreted the disappointment as rejection. "They don't really love me", I thought. "I'm just a burden they don't want to have around because I am a sad, old widow who's a downer". But before I could further spiral into a full fledged pity party they each tested me that, while they both had to work during the holidays, they were each planning to fly, one from the West Coast and one from the East Coast, to Chicago to meet me for a long weekend. I was shocked, elated, and humbled that it was love, which cost them both, that motivated them to visit me, not pity and it was certainly not rejection.
So, Karen, I see that I have more unpacking of old baggage by the side of the road to explore and forgive. Thank you for your loving direction.